Nigerian hairdressers are in an untouchable league of their own. You can’t live without them, you can’t live with them. Here are some of the funny and annoying things they love doing:

1. They love their product mixes- Coconut oil, shea butter, and vaseline in one container.

It’s never just one product in there, it has to be a concoction with shea butter as the star product. And it usually comes with a subtly horrid smell.

2. They love to have pic mixes of Rihanna and Beyonce somewhere on the wall.

Never mind that those styles are now outdated. Nobody does “fowl nyash or feathers” again.

3. Putting your head between their knees as they weave.

Because they want your head trapped right where they want it and your hands off your phone.

4. They love their side hustles- fixing lashes, fixing nails, make overs, wig making, orishirishi.

On a mission to finish all your money in their salon.

5. They always tell you it’s a good time to do your hair even if they have 700 people waiting.

They can never let you leave their shop without money entering their hands.

6. Nigerian hairdressers love talking.

zikoko-Nigerian Hairdressers

They want to talk about the weather, about the news, about that your friend that you once came in there with, about random gossip you actually have zero interest in. The list goes on and on.

7. If you have natural hair, they’re going to complain about it and ask why you haven’t retouched yet.

zikoko-Nigerian Hairdressers

You are stressing their hands and bending their combs with your glorious mane sis.

8. They love to load your hair with grease. (insert distressed emoji for our naturalistas)

zikoko-Nigerian Hairdressers

All this petroleum jelly you loading on my hair there is God oh!

9. They love organising their trainings.

zikoko-Nigerian Hairdressers

Every other month there is a flyer at the salon entrance with details of a hairdressing training session. The annoying part is when they assign one of the trainees to use your hair for practice.

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