There are a lot of things that make Nigerian parents angry, but there are some very specific things that irritate them beyond reason and logic. From seeing their child relaxing to their beef with facial hair, here are 13 things that make every Nigerian parent’s skin crawl.

1. When they see you sleeping after they’ve woken up.

Who sent you to wake up early, abeg?

2. When they see you pressing your phone.

I cannot use my phone again?

3. When they see you having any kind of fun.

Why do you hate joy?

4. When they see you looking idle on the weekend.

Please, weekends are for resting.

5. When they see you looking relaxed.

Monday morning

Do you want stress to kill me?

6. When they see you with your earpiece on.

“REMOVE THAT THING FROM YOUR EAR”

7. Whenever you’re not in the house.

Am I a prisoner?

8. Whenever you miss their call.

You sef see the time you called.

9. When you don’t acknowledge their WhatsApp BC.

Mummy, please stop sending nonsense.

10. When they see you wearing ripped jeans.

“Where is the rest of your jeans?”

11. When a man has any kind of facial hair.

How is my beard offending you now?

12. When they see you with a piercing they didn’t give you.

It’s my body na.

13. When they see you with a tattoo or coloured hair.

You’ll be fine, abeg.

>

OUR MISSION

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.