In Nigeria, a generator could be the difference between life and death. In a country where power supply is a matter of chance and luck, having a generator is non-negotiable. Even then, your generating set can choose to call it quits at any time, most often the worst possible times. Here are five instances your generator can drive you to tears.

1. When doctors are operating on you

If the gen decides to fuck up after they’ve sliced your tummy and the doctor uses his 3310 torchlight to continue the surgery, just be saying your last prayers.

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2. When you want to watch ball

You’re about to watch your team get whooped again but you that doesn’t matter. You have to still watch it. Suddenly, NEPA carries light and generator has said it is on vacation.

3. When you have a Zoom interview

The Zoom interview is about to start. You’ve worn shirt and tie (but no trousers) and you’re ready to start the interview. Na so NEPA carry light. I’ll advise you to use rechargeable lamp so they can see your face.

4. On hot nights

Thanks to all your fornication, God has decided to punish all of us with a massive heat wave. As NEPA has carried light, you want to use your remaining fuel to run gen so you can sleep. That’s how gen said “I’m not on seat.”

5. When you have a guest over

The babe that you’ve been in talking stage with for six months has finally decided to visit you. You’ve cleaned your house, mopped the gutter and swept the bed. Everything is set. There’s no light so you sharply buy 1k fuel. As your guest is coming in, the gen starts to make some demonic noises. I suggest you buy two hand fans, one for you, one for her.

6. When you need to work

After procrastinating for seven years, you finally decide to start working on the night before the deadline, thinking that you will run it. As you’re starting, NEPA showed you who’s boss. You think “no wahala now. There’s gen.” You pull the gen once, e no answer. Pull 12 times, nothing. That’s how you know your village people have tabled your matter in the meeting.

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