Almost every Nigerian that moves overseas either for school or work has faced most of these situations. It’s hard to admit but they are true.

1. When you convert your salary to Naira

Rich Gang. Money Squad!

2. But then realize the amount you are left with after taxes and bills

Well, let us thank God for life.

3. And then you realize you are just working to pay bills

Well there is light, fresh air, good food and good internet. All that matters.

4. After you pay bills and you get a long WhatsApp text and you spot “Western Union” in it

Not today please.

5. When you hear the current exchange rate and its time to go for a brief visit to Nigeria

We about to make it rain!

6. When you are trying to do Nigerian bank transactions and they are being difficult

What do you mean I should send my passport,  drivers license, utility bill, admission letter, left thumb and right eyeball so I can get ordinary ATM card?

7. You consider moving back but remember that there are no jobs

I don’t think it is entirely necessary to make that move.

8. And you remember you may have to queue for fuel and fan yourself to sleep

I think overseas is beginning to feel like home.

9. When your non-African mates are always asking if they will be millionaires in Nigeria with $100/£100

Are you serious? It’s not your fault. What an embarrassment.

10. But then you have to console yourself that things will change soon

Because it is okay to deceive oneself.

11. When you were hoping for change but your president is only changing planes on various trips

Oshey Mr. World Tour 2016. Gathering Frequent Flyer Miles.

12. When people start asking “when are you returning”

Excuse me, are you sending me away? My visa has not expired biko. They aren’t complaining about my presence in the abroad.

13. Or you hear “come back home and change things”

Hold on, let me get back to you on that issue.

14. When you plan a ten-day trip home and your parents say “spend some more time”

What do you know?

15. When you are visiting Nigeria and everyone wants you to help bring “something small” back

What do you mean PlayStation4, a TV and four car lights is “something small”???
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