15 Things That Are Too Real For Anyone Who Has Ever Had To Deal With Lagos Traffic

1. When it still manages to surprise you at the beginning of every week.

Despite how many times Lagos traffic shows you its lack of manners, Mon/Tues morning traffic will still have you like pic.twitter.com/lQtk0uFju3
— Àsà (@Erisean_Logic) June 30, 2015

2. How Lagos traffic looks at you, when you try to make plans.

Me: Oga no vex. I go soon reach there. I'll be there in less than 15 minutes

Lagos Traffic: pic.twitter.com/sJTw8Yic36
— ATL™ (@atl_dunni) December 3, 2015

3. The never-ending war:

In Lagos, driving a car is war. And in war, you don't tell your enemy your next move. That's why most people don't use indicators.
— Ken Ken (@theonlyfbk) February 2, 2015

4. When you try, against your better judgement, to be nice.

When you allow a driver cut in front of you in traffic, and they suddenly start sharing space like Santa Claus pic.twitter.com/TA6AXuSM70
— T’CantComeAndGoAndDie (@NerdEfiko) January 21, 2015

5. This scary but true prediction:

In a Decade if there are no more alternative types of transportation in Lagos the Traffic will start from your House gate.
— Instagram: Anny_Robert (@BeardedCoquet) September 21, 2015

6. When you form sharp guy and switch lanes.

How Lagos traffic works: you switch lanes and the lane you leave suddenly begins to move. You get a chance to switch back voila! Red light
— Okang Ashiwel Ochui (@hey_ashiwel) April 8, 2014

7. When you realize the traffic has actually taught you something.

Lagos traffic has taught me contentment. Never worry about how fast other lanes are moving, you’ll get to your destination eventually.
— The Baby Maker (@iamsupervillain) October 3, 2015

8. This surefire guide to avoiding it:

How to avoid traffic in Lagos:
1) Drive only between 11pm and 4am
2) Buy helicopter
3) Become governor
4) Be a witch
5) Don't come to Lagos.— Chidi Okereke (@Chydee) July 25, 2014

9. That pain you feel when you see bikes just gliding through.

Lagos traffic will make somebody that is inside big Jeep to be admiring somebody on bike 😂
— Olayiwola (@MichaelBlaq) December 1, 2015

10. The Lagos traffic starter pack:

Lagos traffic starter pack. Be wise. @trafficbutter pic.twitter.com/Zkj0kh4bRE
— Frank Donga™ (@frankdonga_) December 10, 2014

11. This incredibly apt tweet:

Trying to elope from Lagos is hard, flee home with a one day head start your parents will still jam you in traffic before 4th roundabout.
— bot. (@sageseid) October 16, 2015

12. The way traffic stops you on your way back from work.

After a hard day at work in Lagos you trynna go home to your family but the traffic be like…. pic.twitter.com/lmZvv5Sc8c
— Buc Nasty, Nastiest Hater of the Year 2000 (@Mhagayr) October 7, 2015

13. When you try to follow a shortcut.

"@Sir_Fin: When the traffic in your alternative route turns out to be even worse." pic.twitter.com/pciXkA2mPb
— NwaMommy (@TheManya) December 8, 2014

14. The side-effects:

You get home from Lagos traffic and your body aches as if someone really beat you…
— Aught… (@Reclvse) September 18, 2015

15. When you finally find out what was actually causing the traffic.

In Lagos, you’ll be in traffic for 3 hours, only to reach front and see what’s causing traffic is garden egg.
— The Baby Maker (@iamsupervillain) October 2, 2015

15 Things That Are Too Real For Anyone Who Has Ever Had To Deal With Lagos Traffic

1. When it still manages to surprise you at the beginning of every week.

2. How Lagos traffic looks at you, when you try to make plans.

3. The never-ending war:

4. When you try, against your better judgement, to be nice.

5. This scary but true prediction:

6. When you form sharp guy and switch lanes.

7. When you realize the traffic has actually taught you something.

8. This surefire guide to avoiding it:

9. That pain you feel when you see bikes just gliding through.

10. The Lagos traffic starter pack:

11. This incredibly apt tweet:

12. The way traffic stops you on your way back from work.

13. When you try to follow a shortcut.

14. The side-effects:

15. When you finally find out what was actually causing the traffic.

About the Authors

More by this author

OUR MISSION

15 Things That Are Too Real For Anyone Who Has Ever Had To Deal With Lagos Traffic

1. When it still manages to surprise you at the beginning of every week.

2. How Lagos traffic looks at you, when you try to make plans.

3. The never-ending war:

4. When you try, against your better judgement, to be nice.

5. This scary but true prediction:

6. When you form sharp guy and switch lanes.

7. When you realize the traffic has actually taught you something.

8. This surefire guide to avoiding it:

9. That pain you feel when you see bikes just gliding through.

10. The Lagos traffic starter pack:

11. This incredibly apt tweet:

12. The way traffic stops you on your way back from work.

13. When you try to follow a shortcut.

14. The side-effects:

15. When you finally find out what was actually causing the traffic.

About the Authors

More by this author

OUR MISSION

Get More Zikoko Goodness in Your Mail