18 Things All Nigerians Who Take BRT Buses Will Understand

April 18, 2016

1. When you’re buying your ticket and the person says there’s no change.

You will not build house with all my change please.

2. When someone forms smart and cuts the line.

Me I’m here to sell groundnut abi?

3. Then they lie about being there before and find one mumu to support their story.

Two of you are foolish.

4. When someone starts a conversation with you so they can cut the line in front of you.

LOL, no.

5. If you’re a girl, one old woman is always there to tell you that you’re dressed improperly.

Yes. You said so yesterday too.

6. When you’ve been queueing for the bus since yesterday and it gets full right in front of you.

I’m not crying.

7. When there’s traffic and all the passengers are yelling at the driver to take an alternate route.

Sha don’t pass where they’ll rob us and harvest our kidneys.

8. Then the driver takes an alternate route and the bus gets stuck in more traffic.

You people can see what you caused abi?

9. When you’re in the BRT and you start feeling better than people in yellow buses.

Obviously, your priorities are not arranged.

10. When someone says “owa o” in the one of the new buses when they are actually supposed to press the bell.

You must be new around here.

11. When you – expert BRT taker – notice too late that they’ve passed your bus stop.

Oh God!

12. When the same people you saw yesterday, are there today and now they think you’re all some sort of BRT family.

They might keep space for you on the line sha.

13. When a stranger gets too close to you on the bus.

Sorry, do I know you?

14. When you’re using your phone and someone is looking into the phone.

Jesus!

15. When someone on the bus starts preaching.

I left yellow buses for this?

16. When the person next to you tries to chat you up.

If he/she is fine, listen first sha.

17. When someone starts eating near you.

Do you not know this is a confined space?

18. When the BRT stops in the middle of the road and the driver is asking passengers to help push it.

Not today, Satan. Thanks to @fosudo for his contribution to this post.
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