How To Tweet Like A Nigerian

I got relatives, got a lot of relatives. Got a lot of people tryna drain me of my salary.

— The Baby Maker (@iamsupervillain) September 14, 2015

"Hey, you want to try cocaine with us?"

Nah I'm cool, there's rice at home

— Keith Dube (@MrExposed) December 7, 2015

When you get to the venue all dolled up & then they tell you jollof rice & small chops has finished pic.twitter.com/E1GcyOF3Ok

— Oh ✨ (@tobby_e) January 19, 2016

Some of you guys tweet as if you are in cyber cafe and your time is about to finish. So you just have to sharply type nonsense and go home

— BollyLomo (@ItsBollyLomo) November 14, 2015

"When a goat laughs upon hearing the lion is around, one needs to find out what kind of grass it has been eating"

— Nosa Ogbemudia (@Nosipopp) July 10, 2015

Tell Nigerians to keep your seat at an event while you absent for a bit and they will protect it with the devotion of the night's watch.

— bot. (@sageseid) June 17, 2015

When two heads are not better than one… pic.twitter.com/A12TwH0QKP

— Fatiti_Lareina (@fatee_Gano) November 6, 2015

When you arguing with your Nigerian girlfriend pic.twitter.com/ug1OMqog9D

— ais the Great (@BabaOloriokoBB) January 9, 2016

My dad only drinks freshly squeezed orange juice. Abeg guage what they brought for me to squeeze oh. pic.twitter.com/lHIB8oMCXK

— Abike (@Jollz) January 5, 2016

My final straw with Nigerian movies was when i saw lady pour poison into food and taste it to see if it was enough

— WhoDeservesABells? (@iDeserveABells) November 5, 2015

Sango would have taken Thor’s place in the avengers. But it’s not today visa started being a problem.

— The Baby Maker (@iamsupervillain) May 2, 2015

When life shuts a door… open it again. It's a door. that's how it works.

— MorenéeMagic (@morenee) January 18, 2016

Lmfao. How much is bag of rice.

Wey pesin go use 50k on one date .

How much be small goat?

— kenna (@kennagq) January 16, 2016