1. You went to go and join “bad gang”.

Anybody with a GPA less than 3.0 is “bad gang” to them.

2. You brought home an “akata”.

“Have Nigerians finished?”

3. They heard you were misbehaving in school.

You have sha forgotten the “child of who you are”

4. You have now “grown wings”.

They will clip it for you.

5. You have started speaking to them with an accent.

Accent = Rude.

6. You want to “end up in MagDonnas”

They will send you back before you end up working in McDonalds.

7. You told them you want to become a rapper.

Better fix up.

8. You got an 89 in school.

People that got 100 have 2 heads, abi?

9. They saw you talking to the opposite sex.

You want to “bring shame to your family”.

10. You accidentally raised your voice at them.

You want to die.

11. You were trying to talk to them when they were on the phone.

You don’t have respect again.

12. They tried to slap you and you dodged.

You now want to fight.

13. You threatened to call the police when they were beating you.

Police? You really want to die.

14. You stayed at your friends house till it was dark outside.

Better just stay there. They are your new family now.

15. You did not add “ma” or “sir” when you answered them.

The abroad has now spoilt you.

16. You actually used the dishwasher to wash dishes.

Dishwasher ke? What are your hands now there for?
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