7 Nigerians Share The Most Ridiculous Things They Believed About Sex

August 26, 2020

Sex education, especially in Nigeria, is incredibly poor. Most of us learnt about sex from unrealistic pornos, religious leaders with agendas, friends with just as little knowledge and corny Hollywood movies.

So, we decided to ask a bunch of Nigerians to share the most ridiculous things they believed about sex when they were growing up. These were 7 of the most hilarious answers we got.

James, 26/Male/Straight

When I was little, my older cousin told me that it’s possible for a man’s penis to go in through the vagina and come out of the butt. I’m ashamed to say I believed this until I watched my first porno at 12.

Sola, 23/Female/Straight

I believed that if you have sex with more than one man, your vagina would stretch and never return to normal. It was my children’s church teacher that actually sold me that lie.

In her exact words: “You will open up, create entry space for the devil, and never close up again. That is why you should only sleep with one man. Your husband.”

Well, I eventually had sex with three different guys on the same day. I woke up the next morning and my vagina was still the same. In my head, I was like, “We move.”

David, 30/Male/Bisexual

I believed that whenever people had sex, they always came at the exact same time. Like, no matter what, when one person is ready to have an orgasm, the other person’s body just aligns and has one too.

That has never happened. With men, the closest I’ve gotten is a one-minute difference, but with women, it’s never even been close. I blame Hollywood movies for selling me this lie.

Ella, 25/Female/Straight

I believed that losing my virginity would rid me of period cramps for good. It was my nurse in secondary school that told me. I think she was just tired of watching me almost die in the sickbay every month.

Ebuka, 31/Male/Gay

I believed that gay sex would mean putting my penis in another man’s penis hole, and that thought terrified me until I finally watched gay porn at 15. I’m not even sure where I got that insane idea from.

Simi, 27/Female/Bisexual

I believed that it was only sex if the penis entered my vagina. So, even though 7 guys had already fucked me up the ass, I was still going around claiming that I was a virgin.

Charles, 25/Male/Gay

I believed that there was no such thing as bad sex. Like, I thought it was always rainbows and sunshine. Then I had sex for the first time and quickly realised that was bullshit.

NerdEfiko

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

SEX
January 25, 2020

The subject of today’s Sex Life is a 24-year-old woman who prefers older men as sex partners because she doesn’t rate sex with men her age.  When did you have sex for the first time? I was 15 and it was with a guy in my secondary school. We did it at a birthday party. […]

April 21, 2020

A kink is defined as an unconventional sexual taste or behaviour, and they vary from person to person. So, we’ve created a quiz that will guess which of the most popular kinks — from bondage to group sex — turns you on the most. Take to find out:

Watch

Now on Zikoko

December 2, 2020

This week’s What She Said is Olusayo Ajet, an artist, academic, engineer, biochemist and researcher. She talks about how art was her tool of escape, her relationship with her family and how she experiences the world one day at a time. Tell me about how you started making art. I don’t necessarily have a moment […]

Buhari
December 1, 2020

President Muhammadu Buhari rode to office on the major campaign promise that his administration will put a final end to the Boko Haram insurgency. However, on Sunday, November 9th 2020, many Nigerians woke up to the news that suspected Boko Haram insurgents had killed more than 43 rice farmers in Garin Kwashebe, a rice farming […]

December 1, 2020

4:38 a.m.  I’m fully awake, I’ve taken a bath and I’m dressed in my all white. My roommates are beginning to let their guards down because it’s the last day. Why are they not awake by this time. They will blow the bugle now and they will start rushing. Anyways, let me go back to […]

Recommended Quizzes

April 14, 2020

Every friend group consists of very different and specific characters — from the parent to the fun one — and it can be a little tough figuring out where you fall. So, we’ve created a quiz that lets you know exactly what kind of friend you are. Take to find out:

November 28, 2019

There are so many talented and stunning Nollywood actors that make it hard not to fall in love with them. So, while we all know the likelihood of us ending up with any of them is super low, it’s still fun to imagine a world where we actually stood a chance, and that’s why this […]

November 4, 2019

After successfully predicting when y’all are getting married (please, email any complaints to noneofourbusiness@nayousabi.com), we are back to tell you how much is currently in your account. How, you might ask? By using your taste in Nollywood, of course. Shhh. No questions. Just take it already:

October 30, 2019

2010 was a game-changing one for Nollywood, with our movies making serious cash and getting international acclaim. So, which of these hits released between 2010 and 2019 — from the pace-setting The Wedding Party to the divisive Trip To Jamaica — best suits your personality? Well, that’s what this quiz is here to answer:

October 30, 2019

Kemi Adetiba’s King of Boys movie got a lot of things right, especially casting, so yes, it was a monster hit. Now, we know you may not have put much thought to this, but the personalities of some of the characters closely match yours, and we would like to help you find the perfect match. […]

More from Sex Life

November 24, 2020

Period sex is sex that happens while either of the parties involved are on their period. We asked Nigerians to share their period sex experience, here are eleven of them. Anna, 18 This was my first and only period sex experience, but I find it a funny one because it happened on my heaviest day. […]

November 21, 2020

The subject of this week’s Sex Life is a 30-year-ole heterosexual woman who entered a celibacy pact with her partner before marriage. She didn’t keep her end of the pact and often cheated on him. Now that she’s married and finally having sex, she feels sorry that she cheated.

November 16, 2020

December is fast approaching, and so is orgy season. I mean what better time to engage in sin and debauchery than the month of the birth of Jesus Christ? To save yourself from embarrassment, we compiled a list of things you really should not be doing. 1) Fake an STD test result We understand that […]

November 13, 2020

I spent some time googling sex positions on the internet (do not ask), so I decided to rename some and share them with you. No need to thank me, you are welcome. 1) Upside down Ojuelegba spinner You will need yourself and two more people for this. Honestly, we think if you draw a circle […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
February 6, 2020
Who doesn't want to find love? In our bid to help, we paired up a bunch of single Nigerians, sending them on an all-expense paid date, and interviewing them before and after they met.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X