Nigerian women are the grandmasters of see-finish, and you must prevent this. The easiest way to do that is to date a short woman. But if you end up with a taller one or even a short one with gra-gra, this is how to avoid see-finish.
1. Never let her know your age.
The moment she knows it, everyone knows it. You’ll now pass and they will know you’re just 24. You with your big body. So, whenever she asks you, lie. Add 10 years to your age or 7. If she decides to break up, it’s her loss. Let her go and meet the small-small boys she can disrespect.
2. She must never call you “Big head.”
Which useless big head? It’s her father’s head that is big. What nonsense. From “Big head,” she will start asking you to bring remote for her, and she will lose all respect for you. If she cannot you Boss, Senior Man, Oluaye Bambam, Baba Kofoshi, let her get out of your life.
3. Let her know that you don’t have time for rough play.
You see that tapping of bumbum, refuse it for her. If she ever dares to hit you with a pillow in the name of a pillow fight, tell her to kneel down, raise up her hands and close her eyes. Is she alright??
4. DO NOT COHABIT.
Did you hear what I said? Do not cohabit! Why are you even cohabiting in the first place? When it’s not BBNaija. It is from cohabiting that she will see what you look like in the morning, and also see how vulnerable you are in the middle of the night. You don’t believe me? Ask Ozo, let him tell you his story.
5. You must never let her see your nakedness.
Even during sex, be fully clothed. Once she sees your complete bulk, her view of you diminishes. Small time, she will say, “Who do you even think you are?” And that, my brother, is a sign that you have “cast.”
6. Never split the bill.
Either she pays or you don’t go out with her. It’s high time you recognised your self-worth before she insults you over a plate of seafood okro that does not have ponmo.
7. You must never moan during sex.
Ladies are dangerous. You moan like this, they know your weak point and will prepare to use it against you. So, even if her head game is fire, even if she is a wonder woman with a WAP, always do your mouth pim.
8. If you decide to marry her, let her bring her family to you.
Oh, you want to go to her family house and start prostrating? So that next time you people argue, she will say, “You kuku begged to marry me”? My guy, it is high time you understood your self-worth oh. Men are hot cakes. If she does not marry you, her younger sister will rush you.
You be spec, never forget that.
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